In most of our relationships, we tend to overlook our faults, inaccuracies, and mistakes and focus more on the mistakes the other person has committed. And this error in judgment is precisely what leads to the destruction of a happy and healthy relationship. Make sure you stop yourself from making these five mistakes in your relationships.
1. Failing to create a sense of loyalty and trust
A lot of our relationships never honestly go beyond the surface. We meet people. We share a few laughs with them. We tell them stories about our life – stories that pretty much anyone we know has probably heard about. And then we go on to live our lives as usual. To build a sense of loyalty and trust with another individual, we need to go deeper than that. We need to involve them with our lives indeed. We need to share meaningful conversations with the ones that not everyone we know is entitled. Only then will this relationship mean something more to them than a passing moment in their life.
2. Violating the trust that has already been established
Maybe you couldn’t control yourself from laughing a little when they started to open up to you about an extremely personal or embarrassing story of their life. Maybe you casually mentioned that thing they told you in private to your entire group of friends. Or perhaps you just never followed up to ask how they were doing after they had been through a challenging experience in life. Whatever it is that you did, it might not have felt like a big deal to you, but it did end up violating their trust in some way.
3. Focusing more on their external qualities than on the things that matter
There have been numerous occasions when you told them how beautiful they look, how sexy their clothes are, or how attractive their fancy big house is. While all these compliments will make another person happy, they won’t ever make them feel seen or heard in a way that they have never been seen or heard by anyone before. Did you ever tell them how much you respect their ideas and opinions about life? Did you ever tell them how their passion for everything they pursue inspires you to work harder in life? Did you ever tell them how you can spend an entire day just listening to their amazing life stories? Trust me- all these compliments about their personality will mean much more to them than anything else you compliment them on.
4. Failing to see your weaknesses
A lot of us tend to set up extremely high standards for the people around us, but we never allow those standards to apply to ourselves. So we start blaming other people for everything wrong that happens in a relationship while clearing ourselves of all charges. This kind of attitude will only lead to resentment towards each other, and one of you will eventually decide to move on.
5. Making demands that the other individual should live up to your standards instead of their own
Consider a situation where you believe that watching too much TV is always wrong for anyone under any circumstance. Your partner thinks of watching TV as their time to relax and unwind after a hard day. If you start forcing them to turn it off and get mad every time they refuse, then the only thing you’ll be doing is to create an unnecessary feeling of resentment and discontent from their side. Allow the people around you to make their own decisions without imposing on them the idea of what you think is the right thing to do. Things You Do That Will Ruin Your Relationship