Is charisma inborn?
Probably you have ever met someone you found likable but you were not sure the reason for liking them. This could have been your teacher, a colleague at work or even a renowned leader. This was because of charisma. Charisma is definitely one of the most important weapons for success.
It can be defined as the tool that makes it possible for you to command a room and convince people to buy your idea. If you are looking forward to being a leader who will have devoted followers, you will need to be charismatic. All over the world, people who are charismatic are considered powerful and likable. When you are charismatic, you can attract any woman and cause her to love you.
Many people consider charisma to be a mysterious quality. They think that this is something that people are born with while others aren’t. The good news is that this is not true and there is no gene that causes people to be charismatic. The truth of the matter is that what you say will determine how charismatic you are as opposed to what you do.
Every person can become charismatic as long as they are ready to modify their behaviors. Your social cues, physical expression, subconscious and how you treat other people will determine how charismatic you are. Here are steps that can help to determine how charismatic a person will be.
1. Master your presence to be charismatic
1. Master your presence to be charismatic
Presence is a key factor that will be a key indicator of how charismatic you are. Presence will determine how engaged with others you are. The goal here is to show other people that you are giving them full attention.
In case you aren’t confident, you will appear uninterested in other people or shy. But when you don’t have confidence, you will appear as if you are trying to show off. Ensure that you don’t go to any of these two extremes.
A mistake that most people make when trying to be charismatic is that they try to look super awesome. However, the strange thing about charisma is that you do not need to trumpet the good qualities that you have.
It is also about making the other people feel good about themselves. With real charisma, you will make the other people feel quite important. After he has interacted with you, the person will be left feeling greater about himself than when you first met him.
One truth that should not escape your mind is that we all like talking about ourselves. When you think about the charismatic people you met, you will realize that they allowed you to be yourself.
In the same breath, when trying to be charismatic, you will need to suppress your ego, remain positive and be attentive to others. Listen carefully to every word that will be spoken by the people around you.
Don’t even waste your energy trying to figure out what you need to say. While this may look like the most sensible thing to say, but it will only serve to make your audience realize that you were not listening to what they were saying.
Of course, there will be a need for some balance. You cannot have to sit and listen to other people the whole day and night. It is also essential for you to understand how to talk to people.
2. Be confident to be charismatic
Confidence can also go a long way in making you more charismatic. Unfortunately, confidence doesn’t come as easy as it sounds. You will not want to look scared or timid but at the same time, you will need to avoid appearing arrogant.
The most important thing is how you feel. Some of the steps that you can take to improve your confidence include working out, dressing in nice clothes and talking about a subject matter that you have a good understanding of.
Make sure you only speak about a subject matter that you have a good understanding of. If you are not good in that specific subject matter, you should openly make your audience know that you are not conversant with it. The worst thing that you do is to go into a defensive mood rather than a curiosity mood.
3. Conquer the basic conversation
In order to be charismatic, you will need to know how to speak with other people, steer a conversation in the right direction and ensure that other people are comfortable. You should be aware of how to speak to people in their basic level. This is why it is advisable to practice this.
If you are wondering how you should start a conversation, all you need to do is to become creative. You can start by imagining the things that you would like to talk about and the ones you wouldn’t.
Is there something that you feel that will leave you uncomfortable? It will be easier to keep a conversation going by ensuring that you remain nice instead of brilliant. You shouldn’t forget that being nice is one of the greatest boosters to your charisma. The key thing is to ensure that you keep the conversation going.
A good conversation is one that puts you on the same level with your audience. You will need to tell stories and share experiences with the person. Humor is also a good tool that you can use in your conversation especially when you are speaking to a woman.
Bear in mind that it is not about the jokes you tell but how you deliver them. Don’t try to deliver a joke that you don’t know well about. This will not only suck your charisma but it can also be quite awkward.
On the other hand, if you can manage to be confident in your joke, it will be easy for you to come out as charismatic. When you manage to use humor in the right manner, this can go a long way in making you likable.
Ask questions to be charismatic
Everybody loves to be heard. The good thing with questions is that they provide you with a good opportunity to be likable. When you get an opportunity to ask questions, it will be possible for you to be in control of a meeting.
If you can manage to ask questions that are reasonably smart, you will definitely be seen as intelligent and wise-These are key factors that will help you show your charismatic side.
One thing that you will find interesting is that you will not need that much knowledge in order to ask questions that make you sound intelligent.
For instance, you can have a look at most of the talk show hosts. These people are some of the most charismatic and likable people. This is the reason why they get the jobs. Not only are they funny but all that they do is to ask some questions that make them look like individuals who are in control.
5. Use eye contact to be charismatic
There are moments in life when your eye contact can send messages that no words can. The good thing with right eye contact is that it shows that you are listening.
The moment you keep on looking down at a person or shifting your look, you will come out as uninterested. This may even come out as rude when talking to a woman as it shows that your focus is not on her but another lady.
However, it can be quite tricky to practice using eye contact. This is because when you stare at a person too much, it will also not be good. On the other hand, too little is also not good. In order to find the right amount, you will need to do a lot of experimenting.
You can practice by looking at a person who is offering you service such as a barista. With time, it will be possible for you to determine the right balance.
6. Use your body to express your charismatic side
There are different ways in which charismatic people can express their feelings. Your body is one of the best tools that you can use to illustrate what you are trying to say. If you are the kind who stands stiffly while talking, you can be assured that you will not come out as charismatic.
Always remember that smiling can go a long way in making you look approachable especially if you are a woman. If on the other hand, you are uninterested or angry, people will be afraid of approaching you.
Avoid expressing yourself using the bad type of behavior. For instance, when listening to a person, nodding is a good way of showing that you are listening.
However, when you overdo it, it can actually be worse than not responding at all. This is because it will be clear to the woman you are speaking to that you are trying to pretend that you are listening when in actual fact you are not.
7. Practice being charismatic through mirroring
If you are trying to be a charismatic leader, why don’t you try mirroring a leader that you look up to? You can match the energy levels or physical mannerism by taking note of how the leader responds. It is not a must for you to agree with everything the leader says or do.
The key thing is to ensure that you are acting like them to some degree. Depending on the social setting, this may occur naturally. It may also be a good idea for you to mirror those qualities that you like in the leader. Avoid copying them and instead, understand their secret before modifying these to fit your need.
8. Show optimism
Like it is the case with confidence, people who are charismatic are able to appear optimistic. This shows that they have the ability to see the best in every person, events, situation and much more. They will remain bubbly and cheerful.
People who are charismatic are able to encourage other people to look at things the same way they do. This enables them to enthuse and have a more optimistic feeling. Optimism and positive thinking are powerful problem-solving and negotiation skills.
9. Remain an emotional player
Being able to stay optimistic and confident will need a certain level of acting. Even though people who are charismatic are great in showing their emotions, they can also be great at hiding them. They act in a way that makes other people not to see their negative side.
10. Show interest to be charismatic
People who are charismatic can be quite interesting. They are good in storytelling, speaking and explaining. They can explain their message in a clear and concise way, with a certain level of seriousness while injecting some humor at the right place.
This ensures that the audience remains focused and attentive. When they are in small groups, people who are charismatic can use their relaxed and open body language. They also ensure that they use enough eye contact. They will look for feedback from the audience and clarify the position accordingly.
11. Showing intelligence
As a charismatic person, you will want to speak well with the woman you are eyeing. Therefore, you will need to be good at initiating a conversation.
You will need to be intelligent and have ample knowledge of the trending affairs as well as all rounded general information. This will make it possible for the small talks as well as those awkward beginning of conversations to become easier.
People who are charismatic will show their expertise in a particular area. They have knowledge of some complex topics and are able to adapt the way they explain the topic in accordance with the viewpoint, abilities, and expertise of the people they are addressing.
Having expert knowledge will go a long way in inspiring belief and confidence of others according to the charismatic people’s abilities.
12. Remain assertive to charismatic
The role of charisma is to ensure that people are united behind you, united with a common purpose. You can use this ability for both good and bad causes. This makes it possible for the charismatic leader to influence as well as encourage the people who follow them in order for them to do their will.
If you are assertive, you will be able to use your skills to get respect and trust. You can do this in subtle ways and are in the best position to persuade people using words that are filled with encouragement and wisdom.
They will achieve this by understanding their emotions as well as those of the people they are targeting.
13. Attention to details
Charisma also involves attention to details and the details of interpersonal interactions. In order for you to remain charismatic, you will need to communicate with enthusiasm and passion. You will also need to think in a positive manner, be persuasive and to build trust and respect of other people.
14. Show genuine interest
In order to be charismatic, you will need to have personal magnetism. One trait of nearly all charismatic people is that they will have a genuine interest in other people. The most important thing is for you to show enthusiasm and interest in the other people when speaking to them.
Ensure that you listen keenly to what they got to say, ask the right questions that will bring in more information and depth. When you do this, it will hugely boost your charisma.
15. Remember names
In order to get the full attention of the person or people that you are speaking to, you will need to remember their name. This may make the person feel important and ensure that your audience likes you more.
There is no better sound to a person’s ear than their names. Whether you are speaking to a personal or business situation, always make the effort to remember the name of the person you are talking to.
Final thoughts on being charismatic
When you learn to use these skills on a daily basis, it will be possible for you to develop charisma. The moment you will manage to become charismatic, it will be possible for you to command a room without putting in a lot of effort.
You will manage to captivate your audience without putting in a lot of effort. This is because charisma is a kind of magnetism that inspires adoration and confidence.
No matter how you look like or the amount of money that you have, you will walk into a room and immediately draw the people’s attention. This is because your audience will be drawn to your energy and they will feed off your vibrant personality.
In simple terms, you will appear charming. When your audience leaves that look, they will all want to emulate you. The reason for this is that charisma will cause people to love you more.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé