Life is always going to bring with it a fair share of challenges. That’s essentially what life is all about . It’s always a series f ups and downs. You can’t always be having it good in this world. You are going to have to go through some rough parts just to balance out the good.
In a way, you’re going to have to go through ugly phases in life so you gain a better appreciation for the more beautiful parts. But sometimes, life doesn’t always play fairly. And sometimes, some of us have to go through more rough parts than good ones. And when overdone, it can damage a person.
This is especially damaging and traumatizing for the sensitive people of the world. Not all of us are going to be as strong or as brave as others. And not all of us are going to be up to the task to face the challenges that life may through our way. We are going to have to force ourselves to endure these trials and hopefully, we live to tell the tale.
But we will not be without our scars. We will not be without our wounds and our brokenness. We will not be without our damaged selves. And it takes so much strength to be able to get back up and say “I’m ready for more” even when you can barely stand.
That’s why it might be a little more difficult for you to fall in love with a woman who has undergone significant challenges in her life. This is why it’s going to be challenging to accommodate her in your heart – she is going to have the natural impulse to resist.
She is going to harden herself and she’s going to make it so much harder for you to penetrate her armor. You are going to have to make sure that you are as patient and as understanding as possible if you want to love her. She is damaged beyond repair – but maybe, you’re exactly what she might need to feel better again.
You have to keep in mind that this woman has been challenged by life time and time again. She has been through her fair share of tough trials and tests. And so she’s probably going to test you just as much. She’s going to push you just as harder. She’s going to challenge your willingness to have her in your life.
Because of how much she’s been through, she might be a little emotionally unstable – and you’re going to have to deal with that. She’s going to make it so hard for you to love her, but you’re going to have to do it all the same. She has been hurt so many times before, and so she’s going to try to hurt you as a form of vengeance – even when it wasn’t your fault that she got hurt in the first place.
She is afraid of putting herself through more pain and so she might not be so keen on letting you in right away. But you have to work hard at getting her to lower her defenses for you.
They say that love can heal all things. That doesn’t necessarily have to be true for everybody, but you could definitely give it a shot. You have to be able to show her that she can still believe in love. You have to show her that despite her fears and apprehensions, your love for her is still going to win out.
You have to be able to convince her that love isn’t something that has to be feared especially when it’s done right. You have to make her believe that the love that you give her is the kind of love that isn’t going to hurt her – the kind of love she can trust.
She is still going to try to push you away a lot. And that’s okay. You just let her do so. It’s giving her confidence in herself. She is showcasing her courage and her bravery. And once she sees that you’re resilient enough to stay despite her best efforts, maybe then she will grow to trust you.
But that only comes with time. So that’s why you have to be patient with her. You have to be persistent. You have to be willing to grind it out. And even though you might scare her at first, she is going to slowly become acclimated to your presence in her life. And then she’s going to let you in.
And it’s going to get to a point where she won’t feel worthy of your love. And you have to convince her that she is. You have to convince her that her wounds are her trophies; that her scars are her medals. You have to convince her that her brokenness is what makes her beautiful.
You have to convince her that despite her damaged self, she is still a woman worthy of true love. And you’re the one who has to give it to her.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé